Monday, October 26, 2009

Surrendering to the Divine…You Want me to do What?

By Nancy Smeltzer

On October 15, 2009, I wrote about Surrendering to the Divine and how this important tenet is part of our Renaissance of the Heart healing practice. Mary, Ceitllyn, and I have found that for our clients and ourselves, when we turn an issue over to the Divine, or whatever you may see as your Higher Power, life flows much more smoothly. Your life can unfold seamlessly before you when you are not insistent in having the outcome a certain way. “Perfect!” you might say, “Where do I sign up?” However, I neglected to mention in my previous posting on this subject that it is important to remember that all actions do have consequences and you need to be prepared for some unusual demands that may be placed on you.

For instance, about 1 ½ years into my spiritual journey, I was asked by the Divine if I wanted to move to a higher level. “Of course”, I eagerly replied. “Who wouldn’t?” The Divine told me “OK, no problem, however you won’t be able to see or know what you’re doing.” “Not know what I’m doing?” I sputtered. “I HAVE to know what I’m doing! I’m a teacher and I have to be able to see in order to teach others!” My rant went on for a few more sentences, and then I quickly understood that if I wanted to move to a higher level of learning, then those were the conditions of the lessons.

Begrudgingly, I agreed. For the next month, I could no longer “see” anything that was going on when I worked with a client. I would know when the healing started, I could tell that something was going on way off in the distance, and I could tell when the healing for that day had finished. Other than that, things were very dark in my psychic field of vision. Our clients however were raving about how much better they felt, and since results for those we work on are what are important to us, I learned to do without my inner sight. Finally, one day, the Divine said, “OK, you’ve learned what you needed to learn” and my sight and knowing abilities returned within about eight hours.

As I tried to figure what that loss of sight was about, I quickly came to the realization that I needed to learn other ways of knowing about a situation. During that muffled period, other skills of mine were developing, such as using kinesthetic or “feeling” what was going on with my body. I also learned to trust in what the Divine was asking me to do. Another event, however, really tested just how much I was ready to trust in the Divine when I was asked to freefall from some outer dimension in the cosmos.

Let me begin by explaining that I fell down a lot as kid, turning weak ankles, with many weeks every year spent on crutches. Falling, therefore, is a big fear of mine. (At this point in my narration, I can hear Mary saying, “You could heal that, you know”, and I will, Mary, after I finish about 30 other things ahead of that fear on my list of things to heal in this lifetime.) So when the Divine took me out somewhere high and far way in etheric space and said, “Now, fall backwards”, I was terrified. When I kept asking why, The Divine let me know I had an important lesson to learn. I was still very skeptical, but figuring that the Divine has the big game plan, I launched myself off from some precarious platform and began to fall.

While I spend a lot of time in some strange places, I sometimes have a sense of doubt whether or not what I am experiencing is real. There I was physically sitting in my safe office chair in my studio, but it certainly felt as if I were falling from some great height. I kept falling…, falling…, and falling, and nothing changed except that I was still falling. I was furious at myself for doing something as “stupid” as deliberately allowing myself to plummet from some unknown height. “What were you thinking?” was of the milder things I was yelling at myself. Then I began to realize that I was going to fall forever, and I got even madder at myself. Who was going to feed the cats, and nobody would ever find me, and who was going to explain to my mother, and, and, and…the thoughts raced through my head. Finally, I decided, “Well fine! I’ll just fall forever!” As I settled into that sense of resignation of perpetual rapid descent, I relaxed. At that moment of acceptance, I flipped over, turned into a giant eagle, and slowly spiraled downwards, as if I were riding some celestial thermal of air “Ta dah!” I exclaimed triumphantly as I gently landed, shaking myself off from what could have been a never-ending, nauseating ride.

Did I mention that you wouldn’t always know immediately why something was important to do when you are asked to surrender to the Divine? Having taken my free fall, I knew that what I had done had greater significance than just the obvious learning to trust in my Higher Powers. However, what that deeper level was escaped me at the time. It was nearly a year later that I learned the lesson for my celestial jump. At this later time, I was working on opening up my heart and realized that what I needed to do was to free fall into the Heart of the Divine. There was my answer! I would ever have allowed myself to dive freely into the innermost recesses of the Divine Heart, with all of the scary implications that were involved with such a release, if I had not taken my life changing free fall the year before. It had taken all of that intervening year for me to get an answer as to why I had been asked to take that leap. By accepting that you may not ever know why something is the way it is could be part of what you are asked to surrender. You just never know where you will be led in this work!

I hope that our series of postings about our thoughts and insights as we move forward in our spiritual journeys are inspiring some breakthroughs of your own. Please feel free to leave us a comment about your thoughts on these subjects, as we continue to build this community we call Renaissance of the Heart.

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