Infinity Releasing and the Grieving Mom, Part 2 continued from September 25, 2009

by Ceitllyn Connal

I have come to realize how much I have yet to learn and how much I have already learned in the five months since my son’s death. I wanted perfection in my life, but in wanting that, I wanted the control that comes with that perfection. I chose to do anything else except move forward toward healing my grief. There is no amount of control or perfection possible that would give me any measure of peace. There was just too much fear for me to manage; so there needed to be more control. I expected things to go according to some unwritten plan, my plan that would still allow me to grow in my spiritual journey. I would think, “I am The All Powerful Human I know what my Divine plan is.” I do not feel like the all-powerful human; I am sitting feeling very unpowerful all of my victimness because my son died.

When I let myself move toward healing, I realize how much I wanted to control when my son died. I would be able to do so many things differently before that happened so I would not have to feel the rawness of my emotions now. It was not in my plan to be in the middle of feeling lonely, sad, angry or alone at this time in my life. Sometimes I still want the illusion of controlling my own steps. This grieving part of my journey is a frightening way of existing, I am unsure of where my emotions will lead me next. It is not an easy road; it has its hard and difficult parts. I feel if I am not able to move through these feelings, learn the lessons given to me, these same lessons will come back again and again stronger and harder than they are now. The knowledge is there for me to learn how to be on a higher spiritual level, all it requires of me is to open my heart to the Love of the Divine. Whenever I feel like I have to ‘make it through’ my grief I know my need to control things and my fears keep me from truly surrendering to the Divine.

The times I have used our Infinity Releasing tool with my grief, my raw emotions were eased and soothed. Sometimes things were swirling in my head too quickly to comprehend anything else except the very powerful movement of the Infinity sign. I knew then that my feelings were just what they were meant to be, a gateway to a greater connection and my anchor with the Divine.

I hope we can have the opportunity to teach you this remarkable tool that can open up so many new wonders. Using this tool can help you to access all the Divine Love that is possible for your life, as it has done for my own.

For more information about Infinity Releasing please see our
website at:http://hearthealing.net/workshops.php

Infinity Releasing and the Grieving Mom: Part One

by Ceitllyn Connal

We have an amazing tool that we teach in our sessions and in workshops called Infinity Releasing. It is a very powerful tool that anyone with any issue can use and have a good measure of relief. It is a wonderful technique to know especially when emotions are raw and you don’t know what else to do. It is very simple and easy to use. There are not many words to remember and it is very handy and portable! If you wish to know more, follow this link back to our web site: http://www.hearthealing.net/workshops.php. I am honored to share with you just how powerful Infinity Releasing and surrendering to the Divine really is.

My son died May 25, 2009 at about 8am or so Pacific time. That is very specific for me right now. It is amazing to look back over those moments when the phone rang, the world stopped moving, I was hearing words coming through a black talking device and I stopped understanding anything. I had always imagined what would happen whenever I got call like that, now I know. It just happened so automatically like something on television or in the stories; it was very surreal and ethereal. There was a floating feeling, disconnecting from all of reality, as I knew it. It was comforting and disorienting at the same time. It is still hard to remember much except the doctor’s phone call and her words and my scream. I think it is good for you to know that sometimes healers scream. I spoke to my healing partner Mary right after that phone call, I am not sure how coherent I was but somehow she understood me. I was not able to think much, most every part of me had crashed inside. The only thing I heard and was able to focus on was to imagine the Infinity sign in the middle of my heart and tracing it with each of my own heartbeats. I was able to breathe again. For the next few days making that sign that was all I can remember doing, that was all that kept me moving. We brought him home and cremated his body. There was paperwork and legal things to do and I wondered if I would be able to continue to move or be stuck in my grief forever. During the first month or so, my only focus was the Infinity Releasing technique.

Now it is four months later today. Some days are still ‘not okay’ days. Okay days are for people who have all their living children who are well and happy. Okay days are for happy people, not sad people like me. Sometimes my movements are jerky and unsure. Although my son is dead, he talks to me all the time. Most of the time I listen and sometimes I don’t. The times I choose not to, I just do not want to hear what he has to say. His words show me Gifts beyond anything I could imagine and I am not able to go there yet. I know I will, my heart and my trust in the Divine tell me I will.

Fear and the average housewife

by Ceitllyn Connal

I love football season that is the best part of fall, unless it’s hockey season. That is the best part of fall. Somewhere in there is baseball. Baseball is my second most favorite sport. I have my teams except for football; I just have teams I don’t follow. Hockey playoffs occur in the late winter early spring. Either you love it like a wonderful book or they drag on like a poorly made movie. Of course, it all depends on if my team made it that far. EVERYONE knows when a game is on; take your chances when you call me. Sometimes I yell a lot, no one can hear me through the television but I feel better! I have sports schedules on my work calendar. The only stats I follow is how far ahead or behind my teams are, at least it gives me something to talk to my son about.

I am not sure where this sports passion comes from. As a kid, I don’t remember watching sports much. High school opened up a little more understanding about football, and watching all the cute guys playing football. I saw my first hockey game years ago with a small local team. I don’t know why, I was hooked. Now years later, there is the same thrill and excitement with every new season - new players, new hope and new outlooks. Those eye-opening exciting experiences made an impact in my life that I have carried with me throughout all the following years. It occurs to me that it does not matter whether the experience is pleasant or hurtful; all of our firsts set the stage for each ensuing step.

I had no plans for my life after high school. I did not think I would be good for anything else besides having babies and being a housewife. When I had some accomplishments, I immediately talked myself out of their joy knowing it would never last and it was just a fluke. I was resigned to whatever happened I had no control over the inevitable. When I was about 33 or so an acquaintance kept explaining how we pick the family we are born into and other ‘drivel’ like that. I was incensed by those words, why would I want to pick my family and all the problems I had throughout my life. That was just bizarre. She also talked about choosing, drumming, power animals, actually changing your life. How could all that be possible? Weren’t you stuck with what you had? Growing up catholic puts a dramatic slant on ones views on life. She kept talking and I started listening.

So many years later, I think back on her conversations and how they began changing my journey. The only thing that continued to have a hold on me was my own fear of change. The known was bad enough what if I got worse in exchange. I did not think I could live if my situation got worse and if there were times that things were good the other shoe was bound to drop. It takes a lot of energy to constantly be on guard and maintain the status quo.

Today, while I still fall back on my old survival fear, I am beginning understand all the layers of information my fear actually has for me. Embracing all that the fear has for me can be very uncomfortable. It is like hugging a hedgehog, soft one way, pretty spinney another. What does this part of me have to teach, what are the lessons I may have to repeat ignoring them instead of facing them? When I want to push it all away and it revolts me to have it close, I can change my view by imagining my fear as the small child part of me. Seeing fear on the face of a small child opens my heart to embrace her and show her all the Love I have been denying myself.

My process of healing has encompassed the whole spectrum of my life. My family of choice has taught me a great number of things, not in the least is gratitude. I am not sure what I have taught my children except that anything in life can be changed (they are not so sure about this healing stuff!). It can be just a matter of changing your perspective, stopping to look back at where you were and where you are now. I am at this particular point in my journey by accepting that I did have a path and I could put a foot on it and move. It didn’t matter what direction I moved – up or down, in or out, sideways or forward, as long as I moved. It just does not matter. I am changing my point of view from a concrete linear road to a view from a completely different paradigm.

You never know what will happen when a game starts, all the fire, the anticipation; the emotions can take you places you did not foresee. Changes happen when you take the field or put a skate on the ice or a foot on your road. From that moment, you can surrender to or fight the flow. Our hearts hold the road and instinctively ‘knows’ the way.

I still do not know what my plans are for my life, but where ever my road leads I am becoming more willing to be in my heart while my life unfolds before me. I have come a long way from fear ruling every breath I took to Love guiding every heart-beat. All it took was a step.

In gratitude,
Ceitllyn

Pain vs Pleasure – A Big A-Ha!

by Nancy Smeltzer

I’m a visual person, with two of my degrees being in art, so it’s not surprising that one of the first “psychic” skills that I taught myself was to be clairvoyant. As such, I often see my images behind my closed eyes as well as if my eyes were open. I’m also very much aware that these images, shown to me by the Divine, are often metaphors for what’s going on and not literal photographs of what I need to know. We three say that we’re enrolled in the School of the Divine, and are shown what we need to know when we need to know it. We are also very much aware of the vastness of knowledge that we have yet to access, and how really simple the Divine is trying to make our lessons. You wouldn’t explain nuclear physics the same way to a kindergartener as you would a graduate student, so we see what we’re being shown as metaphors or parables. In other words, what’s the important message being shown here, not the literal interpretation.

So, as I have often experienced chronic back pain, I’ve looked at many ways to view what does pain actually “look” like metaphysically? What I’m usually shown is a sine wave, since those are the type of waves I know best. (I also taught 7th grade science for 27 years before retiring.) The ones for pain have their up and down undulations pock-marked with jagged edges, as if they were playing a harsh melody. However, when I superimpose the wave that I see for pleasure, there’s little difference in the height, (amplitude) or width (wave length) and some of the special signatures in the two types. So for me, the old adage that there is often little difference between pain and pleasure is visually real for me.

Since I believe adamantly that we’re creating our own realities, I’ve had to come to grips with the fact that I’m holding on to the back pain. Why, would I choose pain over Pleasure, or Divine Ecstasy, which to my logical mind is really dumb? The answer that I keep getting is that to come fully into my own power and access my Divinity is way too scary. My take seems to be that it's much better to stay in pain, as that’s a familiar script. If I were one of our clients, I’d say that choosing pain is not a “shame or blame thing, it’s just an “is”, so let’s heal it!” If I were one of my clients, that would be easy to do. However, when an affliction or belief is one of your own core issues, it’s often hard to release.(Which actually is a belief, so I’ll add “healing yourself is hard to do” to my extensive list of things to work on.) I know that I’ve experienced the thrill of Divine Ecstasy, which is way more intense than any Tantric practice that I’ve been shown, and know that when I’ve fully cleared my issues, I can experience that state of being 24/7. I’ve worked on my chronic pain for quite a while with the help of Mary and Ceitllyn, and have gotten its intensity, duration, and degree of incidence down to about 20% of what it used to be. However, in the middle of the night, when you’re awakened by pain, it’s often hard to concentrate on ones achievements! However, with each passing day, we move closer and closer to an answer. I know that I will be able to do so completely at some point, so stay tuned to this blog page and our web site (see below for updates).

Love to your hearts,
Nancy

http://www.renaissanceheart.com
http://www.hearthealing.net

Creating My Own Reality

There has been a lot written in many current books, media, and web sites about the concept that we are creating our own realities. It took a while for me to wrap my rational brain around that concept, as one of the main facets of my reality is chronic pain. I’d ask myself…”You mean that I’m creating the incredible physical pain that I’m in? You don’t understand! I’d do anything to get rid of this pain!” …I’d cry out. Then I’d exclaim, “You’re just blaming the victim!” and write off the “heartless” person telling me that message.
Yet I found through personal experiences time and time again that I was indeed creating my pains. If you refer back to my posting on the Triune Brain theory on August 21, 2009, you’ll find more information on the various consciousnesses in our bodies. It’s often the Body Brain or the unconscious part of us that is running the show. During research work with my partners, Mary and Ceitllyn, I’d find a core issue of mine and start working on it. All of a sudden, I would be in excruciating pain, making it very hard to concentrate on the work at hand. As we worked through the issue and healed it, or at least the part that I was able to access that day, the pain level would instantly drop.
While the pain was very real in my body, I began to realize that one or more of my consciousnesses, usually the body brain, was so terrified of what might surface, that pain was better than facing the issue at hand. Certainly not a logical response, but then this work is not about the conscious or Mind Brain part of us. The good news is that by staying with the issue and healing it, the pain does abate.
There are two good books that I’ve read recently with regard to creating chronic pain in our bodies and how to relieve it. The first, Healing Back Pain, The Mind-Body Connection, by John Sarno, is a classic on the subject of back and body pain. Sarno’s major premise if that much of our pain is due to repressed emotions, especially anger. Allow the emotion to surface, and the pain subsides. The second book is Somatics: Reawakening The Mind's Control Of Movement, Flexibility, And Health by Thomas Hanna. It's major concept is that the area which is sore has muscles that have forgotten how to relax. The constant tension in those areas pulls bones and joints out of alignment. The book has simple exercises which are a little hard to follow as the pictures aren't great, but VERY effective at releasing pain in just a few days of doing the exercises every day.
So, my take for creating a reality that is pain-free for me currently involves exercises to realign and strengthen the body, and deep inner work to heal the underlying issues that are holding much of the pain in place. I invite you to return often to this blog to see what other new discoveries we make as the Divine continues to unfold and impart knowledge to us.

Love to your hearts,
Nancy

http://www.renaissanceheart.com
http://www.hearthealing.net

That’s Why I’m Often in Inner Conflict! – Triune Brain Theory

One of the major tenets of our healing practice, Renaissance of the Heart, is that we exist on multiple levels. This concept is known as the Triune Brain Theory.
Expanding on the work of James Papez, Dr. Paul MacLean who worked at NIH in the 1960s, called it the “triune brain model”, and associated his discoveries with the different parts of the anatomical brain. For us, the three major parts of our being are composed of the Mind, Heart, and Body consciousnesses. The Mind consciousness, or primate part of our brain, is located in our physical brain. It’s involved in understanding and uses the language of thoughts usually composed of words to get those ideas across to others. Our Heart consciousness, located in our physical heart, is part of our mammalian brain. It’s “job” is connecting with others and uses the language of emotion to convey its information. The third consciousness, our Body brain, is derived from the reptilian part of our physical brain. Its metaphysical location is in our lower belly, and has the job of maintaining our survival. This part of our consciousness communicates its concerns to us with body sensations such as headaches, body aches and pains, nausea, and limited range of motion. To complicate matters further, the Body or reptilian brain, has the rational capability of a two year old, so it wants what it wants when it wants it. NOW! Just like many two year olds, when your body consciousness isn’t heard, it ramps up the volume of the body sensations until it may be “screaming” at you with debilitating pain or other bodily afflictions to get your attention.
Notice that each of these parts of our being communicates in a different language…thoughts, emotions, or body sensations. These differing communication styles often result in our assorted brains “talking past each other” with their different languages. To complicate matters further, in western society, the language of rational thought is given priority status by many educational disciplines, with any other means of communication being demeaned. Most of us also haven’t been taught to interpret the languages of emotions and body sensations, so we’re often unaware that any information is trying to access our awareness. The result is often like dealing with a dysfunctional family within ourselves. An example would be that someone might be interested in another person who really isn’t in their best interests. The Body brain may have unconsciously associated that other person with some primitive survival need. The Heart consciousness might be trying to communicate its fears, joys, guilt, or sadness about that other person. Meanwhile, the rational Mind brain is saying to yourself that you’re crazy to be interested in that other person, so no wonder many of us wander around in inner conflict.
Learning about Triune Brain Theory and how each of these parts of our consciousness
operates was a real eye opener for me, as I had ignored my Body brain so much that it only knew how to get my attention by screaming at me. The various physical ailments that resulted from ignoring these unconscious messages led to many surgeries for myself. These procedures would alleviate my symptoms for awhile, but they’d return often in the same place where various organs had been removed, since I had not healed the issue that my Body brain had been trying to tell me.

Nancy Smeltzer

www.renaissanceheart.com
www.hearthealing.net

Paying Heed to Our Inner Voices

Each of us has a different way of getting intuitive information. Some people “see” things, while others are “told” things. Others talk about following their “gut instincts”, or something just doesn’t feel right. The English language is full of phrases such as “female intuition”, or “That leaves a bad taste in my mouth”. Often, these phrases are descriptive of various body sensations, which are usually connected with the more primitive parts of our brain.

These knowings, coupled with our body sensations and emotions, have a bountiful supply of information to convey. Unfortunately, in most western societies, we’re not taught how to interpret these body bulletins, and focus entirely on the Newtonian principles of scientific ways to know. While these methods have a wealth of data that, depending on what’s being sought, can communicate volumes, a soul dependence on that way of knowing leaves our spiritual souls bereft.

I’m talking about what starts off as those subtle nigglings that something isn’t right….I don’t like that…that doesn’t feel OK. Unfortunately for me, I very early on, learned to squelch my inner voices, so that my body could only get my attention by screaming at me with painful body sensations. As a result, after numerous surgeries and medications, I began to pay attention to those more subtle voices instead of waiting for the “clue by four” between the eyeballs…”So you gonna pay attention NOW?”

An acquaintance once asked me why people couldn’t just part ways as friends, instead of going through the painful, spiteful brawls of separation and divorce. My take is that people of good intentions, instead of listening to those inner voices early on that were telling them that the relationship wasn’t right, pile on often years of connections and then get hurt and angry when they’re not honored. My invitation to you is to cultivate an active connection with your inner voice, listen to it as your own best mentor, and quit over-riding your early warning detection system.

So, Who’s Really Doing the Healing?

So, Who’s Really Doing the Healing?

Well, that one’s easy…you are…with the help of the Divine. What Mary, Ceitllyn, and I do is act as catalysts to set events is motion. In fact, the work we do would be impossible if we didn’t have your permission on a soul or unconscious level. This unconscious part, which we call the body brain or consciousness, is often running a script that is counter to what we are aware of in our mind or conscious brain. That’s why someone might say, on the mind or conscious level, that they really want to get rid of an issue in their lives, but are never able to manage it, not matter how much time, energy, and money they spend on the effort.
So, then what are Mary, Ceitllyn and I doing that makes our work successful for our clients? For starters, we state the intention(s) that we’d like to see happen, and then turn over the actual outcome to the Divine. Since the Divine has the Big Game Plan, and knows what you really, really want in your heart of hearts, our take is why limit yourselves to anything that our little human minds could contrive. Perhaps there’s something way bigger and better waiting around the corner. So, while what is being asked for is usually what happens for the client, often times there are some amazing surprises for all of us involved in the process.
Having set the healing process in motion, we then each sit back and wait to be shown what to do next. I’ve taught myself to be clairvoyant and clairaudient, so my intuitive information is usually visual or auditory. I interpret what I’ve been given and then execute what I’ve been told. It may involve putting the client into a metaphysical chamber to receive extra energy boosts. I may be called to use my body as a crystal that collects the healing energy coming through me and flashes it out of my heart like a laser to certain parts of the client’s body. Perhaps the client’s heart center, or Sacred Heart, needs opening, as very early on in their lives, they boarded it up to protect themselves from the hurt and anger in their lives. Recently, I’ve been asked to go into a “chamber” inside of me, and just “be”. It’s quite effective, but I’ve had to surrender any need to know what I’m doing. (More to be written about this at a late time.)
The result is that my brain waves are at such a slow rate that I’m not really aware of what I’m actually doing, and often don’t remember much afterwards, except that I could kinesthetically feel waves of energy roll off the person I’m working on as their issue is cleared. It feels to me as if I had been at the beach, out where the ocean waves break, and felt the power of the water roll past me. (That’s why it’s so helpful that Mary is taking notes on the other end of the phone.) Oftentimes, all I know is that at the session’s competition, when we check back in with the client with whatever way we were tracking progress, the numbers just about always drop. It’s very gratifying to “see” an issue that has been bothering a person, sometimes for years, shrink away until finally there’s just calm, peace, and light(ness), like a backpack has been taken off of one’s shoulders. It’s very gratifying to be able to do this work for others and that’s what keeps the three of us constantly searching for more answers.

Nancy Smeltzer - 3 July, 2009

Introduction & Welcome

Welcome to our Blog

Mary, Ceitllyn, and I are excited about the prospect of sharing our insights with you through our Blog Page. We see it as a place where we’ll have an ongoing unfolding of our own spiritual paths as the Divine is continuously showing us new techniques. While we do have some experiences with other healing modalities, we describe ourselves as being enrolled in the School of the Divine. We’re shown what we need to know, at the perfect moment, often hours before a new client comes in that needs that newly found insight we just got maybe two hours before. (Our take is that there are no coincidences in the Universe, and the amazing connections between seemingly unrelated events is often profound and astounding for us.)

In the upcoming pages, you’ll find out more and more about what we’ve already discovered and the vast amount of new aha-s that pour in daily. It’s getting past the premise that as a human you can only take in so much at a time that allows us to freely accept the gifts of insight that flood into us daily. What we don’t “grock” on one day, will come around another, as we find the Divine to be incredibly patient with regard to giving us multiple chances to grab hold of a concept.

One of our major tenets is that we’re meant to be heart centered. While our mind consciousnesses are marvelous administrators with their infinite ability to rationally analyze the constant stream of data, the heart, we feel, is meant to be your body’s policy maker. While the heart’s language is that of emotions, as opposed to the mind’s command of words and thoughts, and your body consciousness that speaks in physical sensations, this language incompatibility often makes for a “dysfunctional family” raging inside of yourself, with each faction having its own agenda. However, we find, that when you surrender to having your heart center run your lives, that great peace and calm sets in so that you can go about your day in a state of Grace and Love.

So, once again, welcome to our blog page. Mary, Ceitllyn, and I will all be contributing our thoughts as we feel called to do so. As you follow along with us, you’ll get a sense of who we each are and the awe and wonder that we feel as the Divine unfolds countless gifts before us. We really love what we’re doing and we invite you to join us as you learn to sing the song of your heart, and awaken to yourself. I think that you’ll find the journey into your own inner landscape to be one of the most exciting you’ll ever make.

Nancy Smeltzer – 24 June, 2009